so thismorning I almost commited a homicide. Question: if you say you are going to pick someone up, how hard is it to call and say hey... Im running late... I cant get you today...sorry. oh... and my car has a 16 gallon tank. I pu 15.932 in this morning lol. Its 30 bucks to fill my tank.. and that lasts me a week at best.. crap.
Thanks for all the support crew.. and NIck.. northern will still be northern. I'll still go.. I'll jsut be the sober one with the camera instead of the drunk ON camera lol. You know you need to change something when half a bottle of 151 dosent phase you that much.... wow... I was a bloody drunk. Kenny... I'll toast a shot with you still okay? it is your 21st. I owe it to ya. Joel: cards is around 2:30- 3:00 today at the coffee cart.. if you wanna come. w00t. Hey jon... is matt becoming pastor up there? cause I liked him... and I dont live too far away now :). Okay, thats all for now, Im running on a monstor and thats it. Lotsa love to the crew. EVIL CUPCAKE!!!!!!!
oh and WHUMPA!!!!!!!!!~~ the kitten

Not so long ago, I could call myself a christian. I lived a worthy life, drug others ( often begrudginly, and never very often) to church with me, lo and behold read the bible, sang... did the thing. Then college hit and the one pastor Ive found who can hold my attention moved ( and Im not blaming it on that, im just saying Jim: you rocked as a pastor!) Then college came again and I was so consumed by being a faire geek and living the " I can do anything cause Im young and fantastic" lifestyle... I met boys, danced with boys, cuddled with boys and barely awoke with enough sense to get a first name. I need to find the pivot point so I can go back to square one... give this christian thing another shot. As they always are telling me: god never turns his back on you, if you dont turn your back on him. Well folks, my back is to him ( or her.. I like that idea better myself) right now, and Im finding the courage to turn around again. So, to answer C-Annes comment: I got scared that I was losing everything that was fun and good in my life and I ran away.. and now Im on the long road back. I realised that I wasnt losing anything, I was gaining angst, anger, hatred and a nice little gut. This may shock some of my readers. Good... Im all in the spirit of change this year folks, so deal. I'll still be the same old lacey, just not the one you go drinking with. I might need some help in this crew... beware. So thats where I stand right now: Im turning to face the sun and begin the journey home.

That was way too much seriousness in one blog so Im going to go get a new fetus for february... that should make this a happier post... ~~ goodnight and dream softly ~~ The Kitten

I went home yesterday. Kenny gave me lots of hugs... I missed the angry bastard somehow lol. Oh well, its fine. Bestest friends forever right? lol...
Today was odd. I went to band and didnt read half bad for being sleep deprived. Then, after band I proceeded to be a brat and hide roberts shoes from him, and he proceeded to tickle me until I diivulged their location. I only did cause boy was looking peeved, and I figure 1 day into a relationship is not the time to piss some one off.
Onto that subject: I realised to day that maybe Im not built for a relationship, I mean. Fuck, i've been single since June( with the exception of dave, and he dosent count) and I liked the freedom of being able to see someone once, maybe spend the night ( now, by spend the night I mean crash together... not fuck-fest people... gimme a Lil credit) and then if it didnt work it didnt work and no one was hurt. No one got attached. Now I guess Im in a relationship that the boy really wants to work, and Im not quite sure how to explain that it more than likely wont in the long haul of things. We'll have a blast for a few months( If he can put up with me for that long), and then I'll go away this summer at the emt training, and then working as an emt which will make me even more of a basket case. Im dooming this from the get go. I shouldnt, I know. I mean, I like the kid. I do... I just dont want to hurt him like I've hurt other people, like I've been hurt( and most of the me being hurt is my own fault, i'm aware)... Call it armor, a wall, baggage, whatever you want. Dating me, I come with quite a bit. Im not saying I'll never fall in love, or date again for that matter... I just dont know if I want to hurt someone like him. He's a genuine nice guy. Nice guys dont fall for girls like me, and it in a sense scares me he did. I dont know. Whatever, this thing will run its course in my life and then end ( or not) and then I will be back to square one. Everything in its place right? fate? oh never mind... Im going to go eat a sandwich and find anna. That'll make me feel better.
-- The Kitten --

" La la la look at us were old and floppy and saggy and FABULOUS! Lets go lay naked!" My friend, only known to me as psycho,'s comments about old women who sunbathe nude at Candy rock and others... It was freaking hilarious.
Apparently I have a boyfriend... this is news... more to follow as soon as I figure things out. Wow things are confoosing somedays.
Rex is throwing a party this weekend. Rex= hot. Crap.. boyfriend... cant like other hot guitar playing boys... wait... boyfriend? what? me??( boy in question you'll have to pardon me.. Ive been single since June) oh well... I'll sort this whole combobulation out and then we shall see.
Kenny: IM HOME!
AK Oreo- We'll come see you tomarrow night or something. I miss my Hentai buddy lol.
Nick: WHUMPA WHUMPA WHUMPA.
Maybe I'll get to spin fire this weekend... maybe not. I dont know really.. I hope so. Im ready. Im getting fairly good.
I mihgt join symphony. I think robert might kill me though. I think I may be SLIGHTLY bubbly for him somedays lol. Oh well... I really do want to play in a symphony again. I had such a blast with youth that I'd love to see if I can do it again. I only hope im good enough to not stink it all up TOO bad lol. Im going to go eat some homemade steak and potato stew and go curl up in the hole and crash. Maybe I'll watch SVU. I should auctually do my shakespere. Yah.. I'll do my shakespere. That sounds productive. W00t. -- the kitten --

Recently Ive been doing some thinking about life liberty and the persuit of alcohol. Then someone whacked me upside the head and said "listen: this is how things are"
Thank you.
This post is to my roomie and partner in crime ( BEERSHEEBA!!!!!!!)
I dont think I can ever thank you or your mfmily for everything youve done. You picked me up and took me home and its like im just another girl.. watching scifi and screwing up firefox nad reading your dad's art bell book so I can finally talk to the man about something other than how much he hates the kids sometimes. I've grown rather fond of my hole. I'd never ask you to sleep there... I barely fit Dude.... dont try. You always kick me in the head and strangely, ive missed that. Ive missed waking up, and getting ready to the likes of " hurry woman" or " lights... O..ff...." or "LUCY! GIT!" lol.. its one big zoo. Anyway, on to other things ( besides 3 am 7-11 runs) : Im not mad at you. I never was mad at you. I crashed at Jennys to keep her company( and drunk sit... see previous post), and then boy that is aucutally not cheap or a player or anytihng asked if I wanted to crash on his couch after tai chi... and so I slept on the couch( and my hole was comfier by far) Jeesus kenny, I cant ever really be mad at you, cause you'll do something stupid and then I'll end up laughing a lot. I miss sitting up watching Nick Arcade and mocking the happy black man or whining at Tasha to stop whining or stealing street signs from arnold on nights with meteor showers or... fuck kenny I miss just hanging out with you. Long story short: I get out of class at 4... then back to the college to see if there's symphony.... and then home. I probably wont make dinner, cant promise a time, but I'll be home and we con go do something stupid or get jen's vodka or something... I dont know kenny. I miss you and Im coming home. I promise.
this is all for today.... unless I find something hilarious. or Whumpa does something cool. --kitten--

Nick Horvath is now to be called Whumpa. Ask him why.
Whisky is not your friend, ever. oh.. and im auctually and truely single again... at least I know now... w00t
everyone needs to read kennys shit: he has a point.
Whumpa is the noise people make when they careen down stairs at Jennys house.
I love you all.. but I have to go eat a cuppa noodle now. See Ya!--me--